


No Man is an Island

by hananocha



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types
Genre: Fluff and Angst, Hinata has troubles dealing with all his talents, Komaeda is forgiving and selfish at the same time, M/M, post sdr2
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-25
Updated: 2016-11-25
Packaged: 2018-09-02 05:01:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,271
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8652028
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hananocha/pseuds/hananocha
Summary: Too many words he shouldn’t have said and yet they had still come out of his mouth regardless, his head a muddled mess of talents that didn’t let him think straight anymore. The professional side of the Ultimate Analyst argued with the emphatic side of the Ultimate Expert in Human Nature while in the back of his mind, every other so called gift crammed inside his brain screamed their own little interpretation of the situation until everything was swallowed by a new wave of thought, black and thick like a heavy blanket that suffocated everything beneath.This life is so boring.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [moshimochi](https://archiveofourown.org/users/moshimochi/gifts).



> I wrote this for the komahina secret exchange on tumblr for moshimochi! Please check out their work as well, they are an amazing artist!! 
> 
> The prompt was "Komahina making up from a fight" and "KomaHina sleeping together". I thought it would be very interesting to write about Hinata's POV since dr3 depicted him as a literal gary stue. Since I highly doubt that he just gets all these wonderful talents with no backlash, have my idea of post sdr2 Hajizuru! Also there's so much inner monologue so I wondered if I shouldn't have spaced it out better...

He’d done it. That was definitely it. His mind that had been stressed out for days just couldn’t take it anymore and suddenly there were… too many words. Too many words he shouldn’t have said and yet they had still come out of his mouth regardless, his head a muddled mess of talents that didn’t let him think straight anymore. The professional side of the Ultimate Analyst argued with the emphatic side of the Ultimate Expert in Human Nature while in the back of his mind, every other so called gift crammed inside his brain screamed their own little interpretation of the situation until everything was swallowed by a new wave of thought, black and thick like a heavy blanket that suffocated everything beneath. _This life is_ so _boring_. And when he opened his mouth, the next thing that came out of it,

“Will you shut up already? I don’t care about your delusional problems.”

 

Hinata glared at the reflection staring back at him with mismatched eyes through his mug of tea he had made in an attempt to calm himself down. What was Komaeda doing now? Was he alright? Right after these terrible words had left Hinata, probably as a kind of defensive mechanism to stop his brain from frying himself, he presumed, Komaeda’s eyes had gone wide as he immediately shut up. He had started to tremble just the slightest but Hinata knew, he just knew because his mind had begun to over-analyze everything again as if it was the only thing important to Kamukura. And Hinata wanted to reach out to him, wanted to do something to take back his words, but he couldn’t.

Instead, he ran.

Ran and ran, from the island their cottages were on to the second island where his feet lead him to the diner that was – to his luck– empty. To stay busy he had prepared this stupid tea, his brain completely on autopilot until he had finally sat down, crammed into the space furthest away from the door. And as he settled down, Hinata allowed himself the first deep breath since his breakdown. His mind was silent for once, but that just sharpened the rest of his senses. And as the warmth of the mug slowly crept into his hands, gentle and shy like a certain _someone’s_ hands, he shoved it away so roughly the contents almost spilled over. What did he even think he was doing?

  
Sitting around idly while sipping a cup of tea to _calm down_?! How could he even calm down when he had said these awful things to the person he cared about the most? The person that, after they woke from their coma, had immediately accepted and loved him just the way he was? And how part of him – no, he, himself – had thrown that shared trust between them away, just because he felt _overwhelmed_?

Sure, he was stressed. The affluence of talents inside him still made him queasy ever so often, causing headaches and sleepless nights. Since he basically became the therapist of everyone on this island, Hinata also had to consider everyone else’s problems and how to solve them. Get Owari back to a healthy diet. Strengthen Tsumiki’s self-confidence. Figure out how to breach the gap between the victims and their murderers to reestablish trust. And, of course, help Komaeda get used to his new life, when he’d never wanted a second chance in the first place. He’d spent most of his time on the island with Komaeda, since helping him adapt also gave Hinata a chance to become familiar with his abilities in his own time. It was great comfort to know that he was loved the way he had been and was now, but it was just as easy to forget once he was left alone with his own thoughts. So when he’d tried so hard to stop everyone from it, he himself had snapped. Hinata knew the other former Remnants of Despair needed him, but what good did he do when he couldn’t even control himself? And more importantly, when he’d rather run than confront his problems.

It wasn’t pride or anything that was holding him from going back, it was more as if he was… _afraid_ of Komaeda’s reaction. The several possible scenarios when he’d return had already played in his head a billion times and while he was almost 100 percent positive that Komaeda would forgive him immediately, and yet it was the lingering effects he was worried about. There would be a crack left in their trust for each other, no doubt. And knowing that, there was another large number of following consequences for their relationship that his brain wouldn’t stop tormenting him with, repeating over and over a thought that had Komaeda distance himself from him further and further. His mind was going in loops now, each adding a new guilty weight as if someone was stacking books on top of his head until he finally collapsed, his mind loosing itself in the same pitch-black darkness that had swallowed his thoughts before.

 

When Hinata came to his senses again, it was still dark. Or maybe not still, more like _already_. He could barely make out the shapes of chairs and tables of the diner through the sparse light of the streetlamp outside and quickly concluded that he must’ve been out for quite a while. His body as well as his mind felt incredibly sluggish as Hinata finally stood up. At least the involuntary rest had gifted him with one conclusion. He wanted to see Komaeda now. He needed to apologize, to hold him when he’d tremble again, needed to explain and pray that he would be taken back with open arms and no second thoughts. He knew very well how naïve his reasoning was, but he had to cling to the last hope that was their past, where they would always find back to each other. Hinata didn’t believe in absurd things like fate, but his current life left him no choice but to believe in luck, and he had been lucky to have Komaeda by his side.

  
Determined, he dragged his numb body back to the cottages. Ideally, Komaeda would be in his own room, already setting in for the night. The wooden deck creaked beneath Hinata’s shoes as he stood awkwardly in front of the other’s cottage, his hand hovering just a few centimeters from the door. Previous regrets and worries flooded his brain again but he knew he had to do it. Carefully laying out the conversation in his mind, he took a deep breath and knocked.

…

Nothing. Maybe his knocking had been too soft?

_Knock knock._

…

Again, only silence followed. Hinata sighed. If this wasn’t one of the worst case scenarios he’d been thinking about previously. He’d already deduced that if Komaeda wasn’t answering, he most likely didn’t want Hinata to come after him. And who was he to force him to have a talk just so that he could stop feeling guilty? So maybe it was for the best to spend the night like this. Speak of the bad luck he must’ve accumulated after feeling so lucky for a long time.

He decided to call it a night and made his way to his own cottage. Best not to be seen by anyone or else that evening could’ve turned into yet another therapy session and he wasn’t sure if he was able to handle that after everything. His door opened with ease, reminding him that he’d never locked it in the first place. Even though this was the real Jabberwock Island, he’d just gotten so used to having this broken lock in the simulation. And what was the point of locking himself in anyway? His door was always open for anyone, in the most literal sense.

 

Not bothering with the light switch, Hinata entered his room, already fumbling with the buttons of his shirt as he sensed another presence nearby. He immediately stopped and turned, but while his eyes were still adjusting to his surroundings, his heart already knew. “Komaeda…”

The figure on the bed roused, white hair almost vanishing in the sheets as he sat up. The moonlight backlighted him through the window and yet barely illuminated his form at all, making his appearance almost ghostlike.

“H-Hinata-kun…?”

His voice sounded too thin, cracked, and leaking with guilt and regret. Hinata frowned, frozen in place as if not daring to step closer. As his mind was too busy analyzing the current situation, his heart was thumping loudly in his chest as if trying to drown out his always occupying thoughts.

“I figured you don’t really want to see me here, huh… I guess I’m going to leave immediately.”

And yet, Komaeda wasn’t moving, as if waiting for Hinata to confirm his statement. At first Hinata thought him to be afraid of doing the wrong thing, but he soon recognized a different emotion.

With quick steps, he closed the distance to his bed and pulled Komaeda into an embrace. While he usually wasn’t showing a lot of affection, it was just so much easier to just hold him now. Komaeda relaxed against his chest whereas he rested his chin on the other’s soft white hair to hold him tighter. Hinata wanted to burn this moment into his very own being just so he could remember it every time he was about to do something stupid that could possibly hurt Komaeda.“I don’t know why I said these awful things to you. You mean so much to me, I don’t understand how I could ever—“

Komaeda interrupted him by looking up and placing his good hand against Hinata’s cheek. He was smiling gently in the dim light but Hinata could also see the corners of his eyes glistening, betraying the smile. “I—I _know_. Hinata-kun always looks out for me, for all of us. You care so much for us, and yet I felt the need to overstep my boundaries and pester you further… even coming here tonight, I probably shouldn’t have.”

“No.” Hinata looked him firmly in the eyes and then followed with a softer voice, “please stay here. I need you.” He shifted his weight to lean forward and guided Komaeda’s back down onto the mattress, simultaneously leaning in for a soft kiss on the lips that effectively silenced any protests coming from the other. They curled up next to each other, limbs tangled, both craving each other’s closeness.

“Hinata-kun… whenever you’re stressed, you should just tell me. You’re so reliable, sometimes I forget you’re even human!”

The laugh that followed was supposed to lighten the mood, but it somehow got stuck in Komaeda’s throat and just came out as a broken sob. Hinata just pulled him closer.

“Then let’s just stay like this for now.”

Komaeda replied with a nod as he carefully continued prying open the buttons of Hinata’s shirt which the other had started earlier. Once open, he quickly discarded it on the floor, his pants following shortly after. Komaeda pulled the blanket he’d effectively used as a hood earlier over both of them and returned into Hinata’s arms and they silently drifted off to sleep, too emotionally exhausted to think of anything else but their shared comfort.

 

It wasn’t until a few hours passed until Komaeda roused again, an old habit he still hadn’t managed to get rid of. In the Neo World Program, it had been nightmares and erased memories that only seemed to flood back into his sub-consciousness whenever he was sleeping, but now it was more of a reflex to check if his current life wasn’t a sick fantasy after all. A need to confirm if Hinata was still next to him once he opened his eyes or if everything had just been a too-good-to-be-true dream. But there he was, closely clinging to his frail chest, eyebrows just a little less creased than usual. His breathing was even, signaling a peaceful sleep but his mouth was still drawn in a line, as if he couldn’t quite relax. But that was just the sleeping face he was used to seeing.

Komaeda ran a hand over Hinata’s back and received the pleasant answer of him shifting closer. Everyone on the island could only guess how much Hinata was suffering himself with his new identity, and yet they couldn’t stop seeking him out anyway. Komaeda was no different from his classmates, slowly wearing him down to the bone without giving him even so much as a second to breathe. No, maybe he was even worse. After all, he spent even more time with Hinata than anyone else. He’d noticed how frequent frowns would appear on Hinata’s face, the increase of short replies that just made Komaeda want to inquire even further, every time he’d come to bed late, barely snuggling up to him and already in a restless slumber, and yet he hadn’t done anything for him. Hadn’t even so much as dared to speak with Hinata about his wellbeing. As if acknowledging his condition meant that he’d spend less time for him. What a selfish thought.

But he wanted to believe in Hinata’s words, always reassuring him that he needed Komaeda’s presence as much as he needed Hinata’s. He’d said it tonight, too. And Komaeda really wanted to trust his words as he slowly drifted back to sleep, vowing to take care of Hinata just like he was taken care of as he wrapped his arms just a bit tighter around him. And maybe, maybe they didn’t even need words to understand what the other needed most.


End file.
